The Fabulist

Compiled Computerized Charlatanism

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Chapter: 19
Page Count: 223
Word Count: 119,300
Nemo's Bounty: 998,000 Commercial

"So Good Luck Gertie was in the proverbial market for a relabeling and potentially a nine-to-five behind a laser turret, could such a thing be managed."

LiveJournal be restored to me! At long last!

Nothing too monumental this week, unfortunately. Been plowing through the novel, though I took a break today to prep for this evening's gaming festivities. Planning a trip up to Fargo/Moorhead for a week, if there'd be a Scum and Villainy game I could observe in on, I'd be a happy Wookiee (here's lookin' at you, Chuckie). In any event, here's another belated update of my own!

"Scum and Villainy: My Kind of Scum" Update (Episode 3: The Original Wretched Hive, Episode 4: A Drastic and Abrupt Withdrawal, Episode 5: The Rule of Three)
The Premise: Hiding out on Tatooine, mythic homeworld of Luke Skywalker, the Tosche Station and the legendary power converters of same, our two ignoble hoodlums make a token effort to stay out of trouble, both hiding out from the vengeance of a bankrupt kajidic and in the market for a spaceship.

The Cast: Channa, who used to bull's-eye womp rats in her X-34 back home, and Baroolchen, a Wookiee with a self-conscious penchant for girly, umbrella-bearing ruby bilel.

The Sessions: Touching down in eponymous Mos Eisley spaceport in a transport filled with Jawas, Channa and Barool wasted little time sniffing out the neighborhood watery holes and carving out a little niche in the town's underworld. During the week spent here, Channa'd sniffed out a lead on potential transport for cheap and potentially located a lucrative job at the hands of a local Whiphid crime lady. Barool, on the other hand, had acquainted himself with both Chalmun and his famous cantina, the Flintsone-esque delicacies of Gep's Grill and gladiatorial violence within the Jango Fett arena, wherein he battled a Tusken Raider outcast before jeering throngs for a hefty purse, while Channa negotiated a bank job with Valarian herself.

Evidently, Valarian's enterprises were on the run, as much traders and dealers in town were fleeing the icy grip of her embrace and heading for less corrupt towns, such as Mos Eisley or Mos Entha. One such business was Zygian Savings & Loans, which hoped to open a Mos Espa branch and perhaps turn a decent profit on Tatooine, devoid of the Whiphid's various fingers in their only pie. This, of course, Valarian couldn't have and endeavored to prove to the citizens of Mos Espa that Zygian was less than capable of protecting their money. To this end, she'd need a robbery. A messy robbery. A robbery that the police were slow to respond to and that could blissfully go unsolved.

With two weeks to hoist the Mos Espa branch of Zygian Savings and Loans before their grand opening, Channa, Barool and Cap'n, aboard the Gremlin, headed off to Anchorhead, to go see a Chagrin about a boat. Several weeks ago, the local junk dealer in Anchorhead, a town Channa knew only too well, had purchased, as a favor to local Jawa crime boss Wittin, a junker of an Action IV, half buried in the Dune Sea. With no idea how to sell such a thing to moisture farms and anti-Tusken militia, the Chagrin scrapper had basically given up on moving it, until a certain conniving young Chadra-Fan and her burly Wookiee shadow arrived from Mos Eisley and began making noises about it.

While Barool took the space bus back to Nar Shaddaa to collect the rest of their money, Channa and Cap'n investigated the wreck of the ship, jokingly named with a swatch of Jawese grafiti as "The End Times" and contacted their old friends, the Ubese Tech Team off Reecee, inquiring after the squad of technicians to operate their newfound vessel. The tactiturn and efficient Ubese arrived in port several days later, Barool, fresh from Nar Shaddaa with another bareknuckle victory under his belt, just chasing their coat-tails and the two would-be bankrobbers left their new "crewbese" (rim shot) to ameliorate their sand-belching jalopy into a functioning craft suitable for interstellar piracy.

En route to Mos Espa to case Zygian's joint, our landspeeder-bound marauders ran afoul of a sand storm and accompanying pack of womp rats, which proved little enough problem for Channa and her sniper rifle. Arriving in Mos Espa by nightfall, Channa and Barool were delighted to find the bank's security all Trandoshan and the local police extremely bribable. After securing the silence of the local Prefect Finn, they snatched a Trandoshan bank guard on his way home from Maggy the Gorgon's and beat some valuable intel out of them before knocking the bank over the following day.

With Tra, the Ubese co-pilot as their getaway driver, Channa and Barool took the bank entirely by surprise the day before it opened, dispatching the Trandoshan goonage out of hand and quickly subduing the handful of Nimbanel clerks and the floor manager, a crusty old Toydarian ex-mercenary. The bank sufficently "smashed", Barool set about the "grabbing" part of the equation while Channa entertained the hostages and foiled the Toydarian's attempts to hit a panic button with a well-timed crit that grossly deflated the old bugger. With 70,000 peggots streaming out of their speeding landspeeder, Channa and Barool cut a hasty retreat back toward their hideout in Anchorage.

Several quiet weeks passed, with little and less sign of retribution from Zygian's Banking Concern, save the appearance of a bounty for one Channa and Baroolchen in the order of 7,000 peggots, dead or alive. No bounty hunters emerged to claim them, however, and the newly-christened Cry Uncle was fully operable, if unarmed, within three weeks. Discreetingly shipping in heavy munition had proven too thorny and the freshly appointed First Mate Channa and Boatswain Baroolchen would need to return to Nar Shaddaa to find ample firepower for their new clunker.

They went to the precaution of employing a handful of available thuggery in Mos Eisley before departing, however, including Tait LeRange, a be-mohawked human from the Tion Hegemony and his partner, a Gran gunslinger aptly named One-Eye, for one was glass and the other was bionic, Mrrova, a tiger-striped Togorian female brusier who needed a prompt beating with a half-chewed bantha rib bone to be sufficently cowed into serving, and lastly, Weequay, an old-fashioned identityless female Weequay sharpshooter with a strongly communist streak.

These ruffians recruited, the Cry Uncle, after being doused with a bottle of Barool's finest Boga Noga, clambered off the steaming sands of Tatooine and took to the sky, off to seek adventure, rapine and pillage among the charted and uncharted stars.

Only to stumble directly into bounty hunters.

The Rule of Three, a heavily-modified Barloz Medium Freighter, lurked just in atmosphere, awaiting the yet-unarmed Uncle, offering a comm hail and a hail of ion fire, on behalf of Bounty Hunter's Guild Member #7742, an as-of-yet unseen angler by the name of "Umgor the Mighty." Channa, from her cushy leather seat at the center of the bridge, ordered the Ubese to stand down and Barool to scramble the redshirts to receive boarders. With everyone clustered in the airlock bay, they allowed the Rule to dock, under the pretense of surrender, and prepared for a firefight.

After a bitter struggle in the cramped airlock tunnel between Channa and Barool's conscripted army and the Rule's own mercenary toughs, a Besalisk dual-wielding A280 shotguns, Brienne of Tarth, Gammorrean-style and a hidden Toong sniper, in which One-Eye was slain and LeRange severely wounded, the Uncle and her crew won the day, with a fresh prize ship to sell, a Toong hostage, a sizable pile of credits and the actual bounty hunter, this "Umgor" escaped to the planet below in an escape pod.

Until later, folks!

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Sounds rad, my friend. (resists temptation to make another Wookiee)

Any particular preferences? I mean, a Wookiee isn't a bad choice for an anti-slaving character, but there are many thuggish fish in the sea to choose from... or you could go more the Locke Lamora route with this guest-star.

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